


Glory Hallelujah (Imma Take That Ass To Church)

by exmanhater



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: 5+1 Things, M/M, Marriage Proposal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-18
Updated: 2015-07-18
Packaged: 2018-04-10 00:04:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4369517
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/exmanhater/pseuds/exmanhater
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Five times Patrick Kane wanted to marry Jonathan Toews, and the one time he actually did.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Glory Hallelujah (Imma Take That Ass To Church)

**Author's Note:**

> Because let's be real: locking that ass down should be Kaner's goal in life. Huge thanks to [torigates](http://archiveofourown.org/users/torigates/pseuds/torigates), [lizzywho](http://archiveofourown.org/users/lizzywho/profile), and [lupinus](http://archiveofourown.org/users/lupinus/profile) for their encouragement & beta work, and particularly for being vicious about my (mis)use of commas.
> 
> Title from Go Hard Or Go Home by Wiz Khalifa and Iggy Azeala, because I am unable to resist a good Tazer's ass joke.

1.

The first time Patrick thinks about it, he's twenty-one years old, on the ice with the Stanley Cup and his team in the throes of victory. He can't imagine anything better than this—not until Jonny meets his gaze again and pulls him in for another hug, and Patrick suddenly knows that he wants to spend the rest of his life making Jonny look this happy.

It's only a short hug compared to the ones Jonny's already given him tonight, but a whole future flashes before him, one where they're together and happy and they don't have to give up hockey in exchange. They get to be a family.

Patrick swallows and looks away from Jonny's sweaty, beaming face. He's not going to torture himself by picturing his ring on Jonny's finger, his life entwined with Jonny's in even more ways than it is now. He's going to be grateful for what he has and not think about what he can't have. He's too young to have found the person he wants to marry, anyway. He'll get over this.

 

2.

It gets harder to concentrate only on the things he can have when that starts to includes Jonny like this, naked and panting into a hotel bed while Patrick fucks him slowly, until his voice breaks as he tells Patrick to "Get the fuck on with it, asshole, I swear to god."

Patrick lets his hips move faster, feels sweat start to drip down his forehead from the exertion of holding himself back for so long. He leans over Jonny's back and watches Jonny's muscles flexing as their bodies move together. Jonny's ass is perfect like this. His thighs are spread around Patrick's legs, and Patrick never wants this to end. He rubs one hand over Jonny's hip, then leans down closer to kiss Jonny's neck before he catches himself and aborts the movement into another hard thrust. 

Jonny doesn't want tender kisses from him, Patrick reminds himself. Jonny just wants to get fucked. Patrick can't stop from fantasizing about it, though—pictures Jonny on his back, moaning and demanding Patrick go harder just like he is now but with absolute certainty that Patrick will, because he knows Patrick loves him and he loves Patrick. He could kiss Jonny then, bend down and bite at his mouth until his lips were swollen red, reach down and pull his foreskin up over the head of his cock, rubbing until he could feel Jonny falling apart around him, and then he could come inside Jonny, eat his come out of Jonny's ass afterwards because they wouldn't need condoms if they were—if they were married.

Patrick loses it, coming hard into the condom and feeling sick for finishing too early. He apologizes and pulls out, flips Jonny over before he can complain, and sticks two fingers back inside before sucking Jonny's cock until he comes.

Jonny certainly doesn't look like he's upset or disappointed when he heads back to his own bed to sleep. Patrick takes that as a victory and carefully doesn't let himself fantasize about Jonny that way again.

 

3\. 

Things are strange when Patrick gets back from Biel. The team is doing well, Patrick's in great shape, he's happy to be back in Chicago—but Jonny is acting weird. They talked and texted a bit while Patrick was gone, and Patrick had sort of assumed they'd start hooking up again, but Jonny is basically refusing to be alone in the same room with Patrick. It's not something that would have worked before on the road, but they've got their own rooms now. Patrick's not sure what's going on.

He deals with it like an adult. He gets drunk and cries all over Sharpy's lap in a bar.

"He doesn't even look at me unless he's passing me the puck," Patrick tells Sharpy for the fourth time. Sharpy does not look amused.

"There's a simple way to find out what's wrong," Sharpy says. He stops Patrick from picking up another shot glass, and Patrick slumps back against the booth, shutting his eyes.

"There's no way," he moans. "Jonny hates me and he won't let me touch his ass anymore and I miss it and I'm going to die alone and bald."

Sharpy snorts. "Kid, you are definitely going to die bald, so just stop worrying about that part. And maybe if you asked Jonny why he won't let you touch his ass instead of scarring me for life with the mental image, you might find out how to fix this shit."

"I don't even deserve to touch his ass," Patrick says sadly, and sneaks another shot while Sharpy is doubled over laughing. "It's too good for me."

The next morning, Patrick wakes up, empties his stomach, and lurches back to bed with water and a bottle of ibuprofen. His phone is blinking angrily from the foot of the bed, and when he checks it, he's got ten texts from Sharpy. They all read _TALK TO HIM ABOUT HIS ASS AND LEAVE ME OUT OF IT._

Patrick groans and almost has to go throw up again. Sharpy is right about one thing at least—he has to talk to Jonny. He manages to corner Jonny in the locker room after practice a few days later and makes sure he has witnesses when he invites Jonny over for dinner. Jonny glares, but he's aware of all the eyes on them, and Patrick can see when Jonny forcibly relaxes and fakes an almost normal-sounding positive reply. No matter what happens in their personal lives, presenting a united front to the team is important to both of them, and Patrick had been counting on that.

To keep Jonny from conveniently forgetting, Patrick texts him to bring some beer and adds _don't forget to show up JONATHAN we have to talk_.

Jonny shows up, waves a six-pack of beer around, and says "Don't call me Jonathan. Why do we have to talk?"

Patrick blinks. He was expecting Jonny to pretend everything was normal until after dinner, when they would both be suitably tipsy and everything wouldn't be quite so painful. He blames that for the way his brain spits out the first thing it can think of.

"Why won't you let me touch your butt anymore? Did I do something wrong? Why won't you even _look_ at me?"

Jonny goes pale and inches further from Patrick's open doorway. Patrick shakes his head and yanks Jonny inside, narrowly avoiding a six-pack to the face as he closes the door.

"We were supposed to be drunk before we talked," Patrick says, pulling Jonny along with him into the living room. "But fine, we'll do it your way and you're not allowed to bail. C'mon, man. I've had my tongue up your ass, we're beyond embarrassment at this point. Spit it out."

Jonny's white face turns red in splotchy patches, and he groans as he sits down in an armchair, as far from Patrick as he can get. "We can't—uh, we can't do that anymore," he says.

"Well, no shit," Patrick says, shifting uncomfortably on the couch. "I got that when you jumped three feet in the air the first time I tried to kiss you after I got back. I need to know _why_."

"Uh," Jonny says. He runs a hand through his hair and looks everywhere but at Patrick. "Oh, geez."

"Did you get an STD or something?" Patrick asks. He feels sick at the thought of Jonny sleeping with someone else even though he knows he has no right. He also can't think of anyone less likely to have unsafe sex, but he's grasping at straws at this point. 

"Fuck you, I don't have an STD!" Jonny says. His voice is tight and he's still avoiding eye contact. "I just—I can't do casual anymore, so. We have to stop." 

Patrick was not expecting this. "You can't do casual?" he repeats.

"Yeah," Jonny says. "I'll get over it, we're still friends, but I need a break, okay?"

"A break… from sex?" Patrick says, because he still has no idea what's actually happening.

Jonny groans. "God, you can't even let me suffer in silence, you have to make me say it. You're a dick."

"Say what?" Patrick yells.

"I need a break from you!" Jonny yells back. "From seeing you all over my fucking life when I want more from you than you want from me. We've gotta be able to play together. You have to give me some time."

They're both breathing hard now, even as the tension in the room seems to break. When Jonny's words sink in, Patrick laughs, hunching over on the couch. He's feeling a little winded from the emotional whiplash. This is the one outcome to this conversation that he had been sure wouldn't happen.

Jonny stands up stiffly. "Well, maybe we won't be friends again," he says.

"No," Patrick says, standing up and manhandling Jonny against the wall, pressing their bodies together. "It's just—if you'd bothered to actually _ask_ me what I want from you instead of assuming, we could have been doing this since I got back." He kisses Jonny, punctuating his words, and then pulls back before Jonny can respond to say "I want more. I want whatever you'll give me, dumbass."

Jonny breathes out slowly, eyes glued to Patrick's. "Yeah?" he asks. "You could have said something, too."

"Yeah, okay. But I don't rim someone I'm not crazy about," Patrick says. "For the record."

Jonny smiles, a soft look on his face that Patrick's never seen before. "Fuck the record," he says. 

Patrick bites his tongue to avoid making the obvious joke, and Jonny rolls his eyes. "I know what you're thinking," he says.

"Sure you do," Patrick scoffs. "Let's fuck anyway? It's been ages."

"Such a romantic," Jonny says and sticks his hand down Patrick's pants. "Let's go."

Patrick may be making dirty jokes in his head, sure, but underneath that he's letting all his old fantasies about Jonny come out of hiding. He's going to make this work.

 

4\. 

Patrick doesn't spend much time thinking about how things used to be once he and Jonny get their relationship shit together. He prefers living in the moment, which is easy to do now that things are going so well in general, even if losing in the Conference Final isn't his idea of a good end to the season.

He's spending a few weeks with Jonny in Winnipeg before heading home to get in some quality sister time (and leaving Jonny to endure his boring fishing trips alone with his boring fishing friends), and it's been perfect. The best thing about the offseason this year is getting to watch Jonny grow tanner and more toned every day, the stress of the season slowly melting away. Patrick's never actually seen that process before, and he's greedily soaking up every minute of Jonny's time and attention that he can.

Then it's time for their new contracts, which brings Patrick rudely back to reality when Brisson calls them both to update them on the process. Patrick decides to hang around a little longer so that he and Jonny can talk in person about things. He knows it's a little weird that they're basically negotiating as a package deal, but—they've almost always been linked when it comes to their careers. Even if they weren't also in love, Patrick's pretty sure nothing about this process would change.

The only part of it that trips him up is how permanent it all seems. Jonny approaches the whole thing as if he and Patrick will be together for the foreseeable future and that's—well, that's what Patrick wants, but his unattainable dream of having Jonny and hockey at the same time seems to be actually coming true, and he's finding it hard to trust that possibility.

Before they sign, Jonny brings it up.

"You've been acting weird about this," he says one night over dinner. "Are you having second thoughts?"

Patrick is reading Brisson's latest email for the tenth time on his phone, and he has to admit that he is acting strangely. "No," he says quickly, because he's not ever going to leave the Hawks or Jonny willingly. He chews on his bottom lip. "I'm going to sign, I just—this is really permanent."

Jonny stares blankly. "That's kind of the point."

"I know!" Patrick says, shaking his head. "It's a little too good to be true, is all—getting eight more years in Chicago, spending time with you in the offseason. I feel like we're suddenly grown-ups, and it's just... weird."

"Pat," Jonny says, his tone managing to convey that he both thinks Patrick is an idiot and loves him anyway. "The only reason you should feel worried about signing the contract, or about staying with me, is if you don't actually want to."

"I want to," Patrick says.

"So do I," Jonny says, rolling his eyes. "So knock it off with the hesitance. You telling me you don't think you've earned this?"

Patrick blinks. "Well, I've earned the hockey contract, probably, but is it even possible to earn a person?"

Jonny smacks his arm and leans over to kiss him. "Nah, but if you could, you would have, okay?" he says after, while Patrick's trying to convince himself that getting a boner right now would be very inappropriate.

"I _am_ pretty hot shit," Patrick says, which doesn't help the boner situation, and Jonny rolls his eyes again.

"I'm not gonna stroke your ego," Jonny says. "Or anything else, at least not until after dinner."

Patrick grins. "But you will after, babe. You can't get enough of this." He makes a nicely obscene gesture at his dick. Jonny just smiles and goes back to eating, but Patrick's got his number, and he's not worried anymore. He's going to sign the contract and spend as much time with Jonny as both of them can stand.

For the first time, he's pretty sure that if he proposed, Jonny would say yes. It's a good feeling.

 

5\. 

Patrick proposes on Jonny's thirtieth birthday, which might look like a bad idea from the outside, but they've just gotten knocked out of the playoffs and Jonny needs something good to focus on. 

In this case, good being Patrick pulling a platinum ring out of his pocket after they've gotten home from dinner and saying "Hey, you wanna?" Patrick figures that an engagement ring is the next best thing to another Cup ring.

Jonny smirks, mouth twitching as he holds in a laugh and shoves Patrick (gently) against their bedroom door. "'Do I wanna?' Do I wanna _what_? What kind of proposal is this?"

"Do you wanna put up with me for the rest of your life?" Patrick tries again. He's botching his own proposal—he's well aware of this, but he can't seem to stop. "I do come with an unlimited blowjobs package." He accompanies this with a leer to hide how anxious he is, which he's pretty sure doesn't actually work. Jonny knows him too well.

Jonny pulls back from what Patrick belatedly realizes was going to be a kiss and starts laughing. "Yeah," Jonny says, once he's slowed down to small chuckles. "'Cause I've had to work so hard to get those from you up ’til now."

"Hey," Patrick says, not so nervous anymore. Jonny's going to say yes. "Do you want to get married or not?"

"I don't know," Jonny says, leaning down and kissing Patrick's neck. "What do I get besides blowjobs?"

Patrick shivers. "Uh, whatever else you want, I guess. What else do you need, other than a lifetime with me?"

"Another Stanley Cup?" Jonny says, and Patrick rolls his eyes because that's a fucking given. "Nah, I'm just kiddin'." Jonny grabs both Patrick's wrists in his hand and pushes Patrick's arms above his head before leaning down and kissing him.

Patrick's kind of dazed when they part, and Jonny takes advantage of that fact to grab the ring Patrick's been clutching in his hand.

"Put it on me," Jonny says, offering the ring back. His eyes are fond and teasing, but he's serious and he's running a thumb over Patrick's neck with his free hand. "I'll get one for you tomorrow, but you're not allowed to choose something with too much bling."

Patrick swallows and ignores the jab, because Jonny's going to buy him a giant ring with diamonds all over it, and they both know it. He takes Jonny's hand and meets his eyes as he slides the ring on. It's simple, just a smooth platinum band because Patrick had nobly overcome his instinct to inscribe it with '1988', but it feels heavier than it should. Patrick thinks back to being twenty-one, the feeling of wanting so much but thinking he could never have it, and realizes he'd had no idea how amazing this would actually feel.

"I've wanted this forever," he says after he lets go of Jonny's hand. He closes his eyes, afraid that Jonny will read too much if he keeps them open. That backfires when he starts to tear up, and he gets ready to punch Jonny in the shoulder if he teases him about it, but when he looks back at Jonny, he's stunned at what he sees. 

Jonny is staring at his ring finger, rubbing at the band with the fingers of his right hand, and he's also got tears in his eyes. Patrick can count on one hand the number of times he's seen Jonny tear up for non-laughter related reasons.

"Hey, me too," Jonny says, catching Patrick's gaze and not letting it go. "Forever," he adds, and it's both an agreement and a promise. 

Patrick smiles wide. "So," he says, letting the heavy moment dissipate on its own before he continues. "I've heard engagement sex is pretty great. You wanna?"

"I _wanna_ murder your vocabulary," Jonny says, but he's also taking off his shirt and pulling Patrick toward the bed, so Patrick's not taking that too seriously.

 

+1. 

"Patrick Timothy Kane, are you drinking in there?"

Patrick guiltily puts down the shot glass full of whiskey that Sharpy had snuck into his room, and stands just in time to hide it from his mother's irate gaze.

"No?" he says, and Jackie starts laughing, the traitor. Jess and Erica join in, and Patrick gives it up, handing his mom the shot glass.

She glares at all of them. "Do you want to be able to remember your own wedding?"

"I'm not getting drunk," Patrick protests. "I'm just trying to not pass out from nerves!"

"You can do that without drinking," she replies, knocking back the shot herself.

"Mom!" Patrick says, horrified. His sisters are still laughing. This is like his worst nightmare of a wedding day.

"What?" she says, raising an eyebrow. "I'm already married, darling. I can drink as much as I want. Anyway, it's time, get your hair fixed and let's go!"

Patrick swallows, ignoring Erica as she makes the predictable joke about his hair being unfixable, and looks in the mirror. Now that the day, the moment, is finally here, he's not having any doubts or second thoughts, but he does still wonder how on earth he managed to get Jonny to agree to marry him, to love him at all. 

"I really fucking lucked out," he says, smiling like an idiot at nothing, and all three of his sisters immediately agree. He can't even manage to feel offended.

"You did," his mom says. "But so did Jonny."

Patrick nods, straightens his lapels, and follows his mother out to the backyard where they're having the ceremony. He's going to rock this.

+++

"When did you know you wanted to marry me?" Jonny asks later that night, sprawled naked over Patrick's chest and still breathing hard. They've only managed two orgasms each so far, but Patrick has _plans_.

Patrick runs a hand through Jonny's sweat-soaked hair. "First time I saw your sweet ass naked," he says and smacks it a little to make his point. 

Jonny sits up and glares at him. "You might wanna rephrase that if you ever want to see my 'sweet ass naked’ again."

"Well," Patrick says, relenting. "It was after the first Cup win. Do you remember the third time you hugged me on the ice?"

"I remember hugging you," Jonny says. "I can't remember how many times, though."

Patrick pulls Jonny back down until they're lying on their sides, facing each other. The room feels quiet and heavy in the darkness. "I wanted to make you that happy forever," Patrick whispers. "I didn't know I would actually be able to, but I really fucking wanted it."

"Pat," Jonny says, voice broken and hoarse. It's dark in the room, but Patrick's eyes have adjusted and he can see Jonny's face, soft and happy and _his_. Jonny kisses him, slow and sweet. "You can. You are," he says when they stop, lips almost still touching.

Patrick smiles. 

 

(In the morning, Patrick wakes Jonny up with a heartfelt but technically awful version of Baby Got Back, and spends the next hour being wrestled into repentance. Patrick thinks his marriage is off to an excellent start.)

 

[the end.]


End file.
